Thanks to Pick Up, I Once Again Believe in Love.

When I go out and do approaches, I’m often perceived as a douchey player.  I’m OK with this.  My style of game is wacky, loud, cocky and bold.  Before I started meeting women via cold approach pickup, I suffered through and survived a string of several long, dramatic, and abusive relationships.

In those days I had no notion of abundance with women.  I would take what I could get(barring psychopaths and beasts of uglyness).  For one reason or another, I kept finding myself in relationships with abusive and manipulative women.  Eventually I semi-consciously internalized the belief that ALL women were abusive and manipulative.  ‘Each one is a unique puzzle’ – I would tell myself.  I passively had decided that I would never give any girl flowers, or say sweet things to her.

Naturally, this only contributed to the cycle of mutual resentment with these women, and things just kept getting worse and worse.  After some life changing events, I had begun doing pickup.  I realized that I could allow myself to be MUCH pickier with my women.  By being choosy AND by screening out undesirables with my approach style.

About 8 months ago when I started doing this, I met a very special young lady who I am still seeing today.  We’ll call her Matilda.  This is not her real name.

SIdenote:  The lyrics of the songs by the band The Magnetic Fields are approximately 50 times more profound and poetic than all the classical poetry and literature ever written on the subject of love.  Reader, I will kindly direct you to allow this song to play in the background as you continue reading my story:

My ridiculous cocky approach style resonated with Matilda perfectly from the moment we met.  I led her away and kissed her within minutes of meeting in the club.  That night we had sex.  The second time I saw her I laid out the ‘deal’.  Strict non-exclusive polyamory.  I of course told her that I do pick-up and all other controversial information about myself.

I see her maybe once every few weeks.  We don’t really speak in between. Polyamory is not her preferred M.O. of experiencing love, but for now she is OK with seeing me via this model.

For reasons most likely unrelated to her profession(nurse), she is one of the most kind, caring, and altruistic humans I have ever met.  All the ways that one can ‘give’ in a relationship, she gives to me.  Without any conditions.  Without any contingencies.  Truly wanting nothing in return.

For example there are various sexual acts that have always been profoundly symbolic of appreciation and ‘giving’ to me.  She showers me with these acts without hesitation.

Paradoxically, Matilda has achieved what every manipulative and abusive ex-girlfriend I’ve ever had TRIED to achieve, but always failed.  She has coaxed me into feeling authentically inspired to shower her with a comparable sort of barrage of affection, validation, and sweetness.

Before, sweetness and affection always felt like a means to an end with my girls.  I would sometimes provide it, but always brace myself afterwards, expecting to be taken advantage of in response.  With Matilda, I am sweet to her because I just can’t help it.  I simply adore her, and God she deserves it.

I don’t quite understand the mechanics behind it, but something about my cocky, silly approach style seems to screen out cold-hearted bitches.  I still often get rejected, but the girls that are in fact charmed by my ways, are always beings of love and delight.

If it hadn’t been for game, I probably would have given up on my belief in the existence of pure love.  I would have grown cold, bitter, and perpetually resentful.  But, surprise! There are sweet girls out there, but without game I might not have ever meet them!

Thank you game.

Thank you Matilda.

I love you

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